Archive - Candy for Breakfast

Missionary Impossible

Ross Douthat tries and fails to turn me religious

Apr 4

March 2025

A Few of My More Humiliating First Date Mishaps

100% true stories from my single days.

Mar 12

February 2025

How I kinda, sorta, maybe stopped being an atheist

Feb 21

January 2025

Another Twelve Months I’ll Never Get Back

2024 in review and “resolutions” for 2025

Jan 3

December 2024

November 2024

What I've Been Reading About the Election

Nov 7, 2024

October 2024

Having a Kid Is Already Fucking Me Up and He Hasn't Even Been Born Yet

The only essay you'll ever read about parenthood that compares it to fucking a sheep.

Oct 27, 2024

September 2024

How terrible music and ridiculous outfits taught me to love dancing

Sep 8, 2024

August 2024

So You Want to Be a Machine Politician

Everything you didn’t realize you wanted to know about mid-century machine politics

Aug 8, 2024

July 2024

A Reboot Stamping on a Human Face—Forever

Every movie is a remake. And so is every election, apparently.

Jul 8, 2024

June 2024

Political Memoirs, Reviewed

Assorted thoughts on a few political memoirs, which I keep reading despite being inevitably disappointed.

Jun 7, 2024

#nojs-banner { position: fixed; bottom: 0; left: 0; padding: 16px 16px 16px 32px; width: 100%; box-sizing: border-box; background: red; color: white; font-family: -apple-system, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif, "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", "Segoe UI Symbol"; font-size: 13px; line-height: 13px; } #nojs-banner a { color: inherit; text-decoration: underline; } This site requires JavaScript to run correctly. Please turn on JavaScript or unblock scripts